Saturday, July 12, 2014

Closet Nursery Transformation Pt. 2

The closet nursery is coming along! My little baby space is becoming a little cozy nook for my little baby.

Here's where we were

And now we have furniture and some stuff on the walls. Never mind the horendous flaws in the peel and stick wallpaper... it was my first time and it was a pain in the friggin' A!

Alls I need is some baby stuff to put in there. Also, yeah, and a baby nugget. Woo! 15 weeks.

Thursday, July 10, 2014

24 Weeks


I can't do the same questionnaire for each belly sticker so here are my Pregnancy Bullet Points. 

*I use far too many apps to track Beansie's progress, but from what I can gather, she appears to be as large as an eggplant this week. Weight is around 1-1.5 lbs and length is nearing or at one foot. Eeeep! 

*Feeling more stuff. It's still very random, but sometimes when I forgot why I'm swelling or feeling like poo, I get a little nudge reminder -- It's for her. 

*I'm sleeping fairly well these days. (Knock. Wood.) I know it won't last, but it's soooo nice. 

*We have a name! It's.... a secret. Believe it or not, this was Jimmy's idea. I think he knows I'll put too much stock into what people will say and the name we have chosen isn't your average girl's name.  I'm sure we'll get plenty of opinions, but maybe people will be less harsh (or less vocal) if they have a cute, cuddly, squishy face to put with it. 

*I heart maternity underwear. 

*My belly is growing but people still either: can't tell I'm pregnant or, if they were made aware, usually have a comment about how I'm not showing much at all. Uhm, complex. When I was at the OB last week, she said I measured fine. I guess I can look back at this when people are asking me if I'm carrying multiples and laugh. Or cry. Side note: I feel totally bad for ever commenting on a pregnant woman's belly size. Ever.

*Headaches, back and hip stiffness and swelling are things that are happening. Also, when I get up in the morning and walk towards the coffee pot, my feet feel like I danced in high heels at a wedding the night before. 

*No weird cravings but this morning I found myself ready for lunch at 9:30. 

*Drinking enough water is like a job. I have to stay. on. it.  

*Glucose screening test is coming up in a few weeks, to hopefully rule out gestational diabetes. 

*Jimmy is getting excited I think. We've talked about two-year old soccer at the Y after he saw a sign (how friggin' cute?) and he's said "my kid" on occasion when talking about certain scenarios. He likes to break the news to his favorite people like the proud papa he already is. 

*OH AND THIS: He asked for a baby belly rub before he was rolled into surgery. I took his hand and put it on my belly before they took him. Yeah, I know -- tears. 

Will update on the Project Closet Nursery soon. It's coming along quite nicely I might say. 

Sunday, July 6, 2014

Surgery Eve Eve

Another surgery date is looming in The Moore household.  We'll rise (but probably not shine) extremely early Tuesday morning for the second of two head surgeries for Jimmy.

He'll be getting the tissues expanders finally taken out of his head. He had them put in seven months ago. Since then, he's had fluid added into the expanders every 2-3 weeks to stretch out the tissue. Tuesday, his wound doctor will remove the expanders and cover his head wound with the healthy, stretched tissue.

I'll be excited to finally see Jimmy in his stinky ole Boston ball cap, something he hasn't been able to wear yet this year. He'll look like his old self again. I might cry. Emotions.

The first surgery was extremely stressful. His surgery was delayed until the afternoon. Jimmy hadn't been allowed to eat anything since midnight. Then, the surgery took a long time. It wasn't until like 9pm when I could finally go back and see him in recovery.  It was the longest day and I had no clue if they had forgotten about me in  family waiting.

They didn't. And now I know this time they'll most likely come and get me no matter how late. 

During all of that was the stress of finding out if a recent fertility procedure had worked. I had packed pregnancy tests in the side pocket of my purse, but kept getting negatives. I was a hot mess.

Now I'm in month six of pregnancy and really need to work on my stress level. Surely, the January surgery stress will help me with my expectations.

I hope this surgery isn't as painful for Jimmy. Maybe the taking of the things out will hurt less than the putting of things in. I hope.

Either way, he'll be admitted back into The Shepherd Center again to be monitored, post surgery. We'll be there for 3-6 days.

As much as we looked forward to the break from our home health (24-7) nurses, man the constant flow of people in your room at all hours of the night can truly suck. There is zero sleep happening and some folks have the poorest of bedside manners - turning on full, overhead lights at 6am. Oh, they don't care if you just had head surgery and have the most massive headache of all headaches. Blood, apparently, has to be drawn on their schedule and on their preference of atmosphere. Jerks. Okay, clearly not everyone sucks at the hospital. But don't be a jerk, blood draw guy!  

Getting stable and back home as soon as possible and having one nurse at our disposal at all times is actually quite nice.  

Over the past few months, Jimmy hasn't wanted to emerge much from the house with his max fluid-filled head. However, I was able to get him out to watch the first game of The World Cup with one of his bests who drove many miles just to do that with him, to travel to a dear friend's wedding, and yesterday, to a Braves game to be a part of a Bachelor party for a wedding party he was invited to be in. 




He's been a good sport considering he doesn't look and feel like his "normal" self. He does what he can for feeling like crap most of the time.

It's time to start feeling better though. It's time to put the Boston cap back on.

It's time get ready for a new bundle. The countdown is on.

116ish days left.

Thursday, June 12, 2014

20 Weeks

Halfway through the pregnancy! I can't believe it. I feel like I haven't grown but then I look back at 16 week picture and, yeah, belly looks a little bigger.


Total Weight Gain/Loss: Some gained.

Maternity clothes: All day everyday.

Stretch marks: I don't think so. Let me rephrase: I don't think any of my current stretch marks are from pregnancy.

Sleep: Varies from night to night. Sometimes good. Sometimes not very much at all. There's the whole waking up to pee a lot. Sometimes I can go right back to sleep. Sometimes I need the TV's help. Naps still needed during the afternoon from time to time.   


Movement: It's all very popcorny feeling still.

Food cravings: Mexican. Ice Creamy things. Smoothies. Sno-cones look good. Sno-cones never look good.   

Gender: GURL.

Labor signs: Nah.

Belly button - in or out? In. I do check it a lot though.

What I miss: I'm all set. 

What I am looking forward to: Definitive baby movement. Getting more baby gear. Looking truly pregnant and not just chubs.     

Milestones: Having the anatomy scan, seeing her move/change positions (cross legs and suck thumb) confirming gender. 

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Three Years Since 'I Do'

James Walter, 

I love you more than anything on this planet. Thank you for always caring and listening. I'm convinced if we somehow made it through all of this, still breathing, we can make it through anything. Our little girl is in for a real treat with a Poppa like you. 

Thank you for three years of real, true, ugly love. 

I couldn't ask for anything more. 

“Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Friday, June 6, 2014

It's a GIRL (and other craziness)

We just recently confirmed at our anatomy scan that we are having A GIRL. We kind of already knew, though. 

At 12 weeks, when I was having some screenings done, I made the ultrasound tech guess on baby's gender. She told us not to hold her to this, but based on what she was seeing, she was thinking girl. She said she was about 75% sure.

Jimmy just knew it was a girl. I thought for sure boy, but at 12 weeks still felt it could go either way. 

It was just a few days later, when my parents came to visit, that I got the urge to do a mini-reveal for them. But what do you do when you really aren't sure but are still very excited to tell what may be?

I thought these balloons explained.

It's PROBABLY a girl.  
After 12 week ultrasound
At about 17 weeks, only about two weeks before our anatomy scan that I knew would reveal gender more accurately, I got super antsy and decided to get an elective ultrasound done. I had started playing around on registries and really REALLY wanted to know. 

I booked an appointment for the next day to have a "gender peek."  Jimmy came and when we got there, we tried and tried, but couldn't get him in the building. I did email the company beforehand to check on it. They told me the entrance was not accessible because they had a few small steps. We have a ramp. I thought it wouldn't be a problem. 

It was a huge, sweaty, stressful problem and a massive emotional blow. The entrance was a logistical nightmare for a wheelchair. We spent a good 30 minutes trying. Jimmy felt like crap that day and still came with me to the ultrasound. That's huge husband points. I tried not to cry while in the waiting room alone. I think I did. Not crying is impossible these days. We agreed we'd get a DVD done so he could see what I was seeing. We were there. Might as well go in and do it.

I got the ultrasound done. I then ran outside to tell Jimmy the news who was waiting right outside the building. He was still convinced it was a girl. He was right. 

I ran outside with tears in my eyes and couldn't get words out. I finally did and we hugged. He was pretty proud he was right all along. He was happy. I was happy. It was good getting a little more confirmation although we were both a little scarred from just one of us being able to go in. He was truly a good sport about it. I love him. 

When we got home we watched the DVD together of our little girl moving all about. You know you are excited to be a parent when you get teary-eyed and proud watching an ultrasound DVD. 

I would peek over at his face while watching and see his smile and it made everything okay. 

Fast forward to week 18, almost 19 of pregnancy: The Anatomy Scan. 

There was a little bit of anxiety for this appointment. I don't know if it was friends who had gotten bad news at anatomy scan or because I keep waiting for bad news. As awful as that is, (and I know I should stop it) I think it's a side-effect of the accident. I occupied myself that morning before the appointment by putting a big piece of baby furniture together.

We got news our little girl looked good and healthy! Music to our ears. We saw baby move (something we always like to see), listened to her strong heartbeat, and watched as the tech measured and examined each part of her body. All her parts measured average. Brain looked good. Heart had four chambers. Spine looked "beautiful" as the tech said.   

We got double confirmation it was a girl. Jimmy said he still wasn't convinced... (although, whatever, he was). The med assistant we were talking to said that the ultrasound tech at the practice had been there for 30 years and has never been wrong. That's quite a record.

Baby girl had her legs crossed and was sucking her thumb. She looked pretty chill hanging out in there. 


I was floating on air looking at my ultrasound pictures of MY DAUGHTER. 

What a wonderful day. Until reality slithered back in and slapped us both silly.

We arrived at home and pulled in the parking garage. Jimmy's chair died just as he was about to make his way out of the van. His electric chair. His 500lbs electric chair. It's been having problems, although hasn't acted up to this extent. We've been waiting for some parts to come in.

Although it's not a battery problem, usually getting his chair fully charged somehow can help these weird errors we've been seeing.

I sent the nurse up to get the charger while I sat with Jimmy. We waited and waited. She eventually came back down -- without the charger. She said she couldn't get the door unlocked. 

We later found out she went to the wrong floor in a panic. 

Sigh.  

I went and got the charger but it didn't work. Still stuck.

During that time, Jimmy started getting secretions and needed to be suctioned. So he's stuck and coughing. Not good. I was trying to think straight. 

We used the power inverter in the car for his cough assist machine but it wasn't pulling enough power to properly function. Couldn't clear his lungs. 

We put his chair in manual push mode and started pushing his chair to the elevator. I'm acutely aware I shouldn't have been doing that, but was left without options. (In hindsight, of course, I have come up with some less physically taxing options.) 

We got him upstairs and to our door. We couldn't get him over the metal threshold.. Just couldn't. I hadn't eaten lunch. I was shaky from that and pushing him. We were able to plug up the cough assist and suction him on the front stoop. And then we finally were able to get his chair charging. We got him enough juice to cross into the apartment. And then, another error on the chair. At least we were in the apartment, although just barely. 

Then, he started to get dizzy. Usually tilting back will solve that issue. Can't do that in a dead chair though. So I propped his legs up on mine, another solution for helping low blood pressure. We sat there in our foyer, with his legs up on mine. Him stuck. Me sweaty and weak. Both of us starving. 

 
I sent the nurse down to the van to get the food we had gotten on the way home. 

Chipotle had never been so good. 

Foyer lunch. 

What a day. All I could do was laugh at what had just happened. After I cried, of course.

HAPPY BABY STUFF and then? Reality: "Uhm, come back down to Earth, you guys.You still have to deal with this stuff, too." 

This crazy, crazy life.  

Friday, May 23, 2014

Closet Nursery Transformation

I might have written about this awhile back. When we talked about bringing a baby home, I wondered where the little tot would go. There's no empty room that's a clearly designated nursery. We live in a two-bedroom condo. I get a room. Jimmy gets a room. And it works for us. He comes with nurses and equipment. I come with... well, needing my own space.

I talked about turning half my room into a nursery, although I didn't love that idea. Then I thought it might be easier to sacrifice my closet space versus changing my entire room zen space.

Closet it is. 

My parents were here recently and my dad helped me take some shelves down, putty the walls, paint and put some furniture together. And by helping me I mean did every single bit of that himself. 

Here's mini-me's closet nursery so far, and the process of getting here. Sometimes I think it's really small. Then I look at THIS. My nursery is a closet mansion compared to that. I realize it's really enough space for a mini-human, for now. For awhile actually.






So for all you mathy numbery people, this closet space is like 7 and some change feet by 8 feet. A baby is like 1/18th of that -- or something. I'm really bad at math.

Let's move on.

So, there's the sweet little crib. Isn't it sweet?

It was a little panicky ordering a crib at 11 weeks pregnant. Felt super duper early. However, logistically, I wanted someone qualified to put a crib together. I didn't feel I was that person. Especially with how difficult crib assembly seems to be by all the Facebook dads who take pictures of the millions of pieces and their faces of frustration.  

Turns out, this model was super easy to put together. Dad was done in like 30-40 minutes. Of course. I'm still grateful.

So grey room, white crib. Will add color with news of gender and update you on this space as it comes along. 

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Hair-Growing

I don't know why, but now that I'm pregnant, I want my hair to be long again. 

And it's sooo not. 

I'm growing it out currently, though. I was going to do it on my own, but I refuse to have a mullet during the growing-out process. So... I went to see my bro Timothy at Salon Red today. 

He cut my original pixie/crop back in January. 

There's actual articles on the interwebs on how to grow pixies out. I skimmed over one before I went and realized there is some professional assistance that will be needed to do this non-awkwardly. 

Here's where we are:

The January chop-off

Today after my mullet-removal

I guess it's growing. Only the back was cut so the the front could catch up with it and even it out (yes, the back was even longer than this). I didn't think today's cut would make that much difference but ZOMG,  it looks so much better than it did. 

You would think with all the extra vitamins and milk and crap I'm digesting it would be longer by now. Or maybe you wouldn't think. I would think.

I go back in another 10 weeks for another maintenance cut. We'll see where it is then. 

I know you all will be waiting on the edge of your seats... 

Monday, May 19, 2014

16 Weeks

Oh HEY. Here's a "belly pic" of me at 16.5 weeks.
Keep in mind I'm wearing maternity jeans which I feel make the belly
look a tad rounder than it actually is. 


Oh. Those stickers don't work as mirror pics. Der. 
Here ya go. 
I'm finally remembering to use the belly decals my friend got me! 
Kinda cute, actually.


How far along? We've already covered that. 

How big is baby? Don't know officially but all my apps say 3-5 ounces and 4-5 inches long. Grow baby grow!

Total weight gain/loss: Next question, nosy. 

Maternity clothes? YES. Hand me downs are working quite nicely. I have a few things I bought but the day-to-day stuff I got on loan including the super cute top pictured above along with the maternity skinny jeans.

Sleep: I'm sleeping really well now compared to the 1st trimester. In fact, I think I'm requiring more and more sleep all the time. Yes, yes I know: "Enjoy it while you can!" (If I had a nickel.) Trying to train myself to stay off my back which, incidentally, is where I sleep the soundest. Damn it.

Best moment this week: Jimmy thinking my sharp abdominal pains/ligament stretching were baby kicks. It was cute.  Also, we talked about some names. 

Movement: I may have felt some bubbly stuff. I have no clue if that's baby or not. Waiting for more definitive movement, although in the last two ultrasounds we saw baby kicking and stretching.

Food cravings:  Fresh fruit. Fruit smoothies. Fruit salad. Cheese. Chips and salsa. Bacon. Orange juice. Pizza. Italian. Mexican. I bought pomegranate juice for the first time. So good.

Food Aversions: I don't know.  Leftovers are iffy.

Gender:  We should know soon.  

Labor Signs:  Nah.

Pregnancy Symptoms: Plenty-o-fatigue. Some nausea. Some dizziness. Acne. Chubs.

Belly Button in or out? Still an innie.

What I miss: Running. Cocktails. 

What I am looking forward to: Finding out how baby's doing and gender.  Really any chance to see the lil tot.

Upcoming appointments/events: Anatomy/gender scan in two weeks. (Eeek!)

Milestones: Hearing heartbeat when I go to OB's office. I still can't believe there's a little baby muffin growing inside of me. How Sci-Fi! Also, when I officially crossed over into the 2nd trimester. It's just so surreal that this is happening.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Pool Day

Yesterday I spent a few hours at the pool. It was hot and I wanted to lounge, and, with the right amount of sunscreen, if I closed my eyes, I could smell the beach. Oh how I miss the beach. Ah, home. 

Yes. I see this happening a lot this hot summer. A growing belly, lounging and laps.
Best part? Jimmy came out and lounged with me. I get so exited when he decides to emerge from the house.
I know he was so tired not to mention less than thrilled to be out with the work being done on his head. But he came and it made me happy and he's a good husband. 

He got a tan line in like 2.5 minutes. Whateverrrr. He wasn't scared to mention that a few times to me, either. 

So there was extremely pale person at the pool and another person showing off his tan. 

But, poolside happiness. 

Pregnancy update: Almost 16 weeks. I feel the bump is on the way. Or maybe I just hope. Just to clarify for onlookers that I'm with child and not eating too many chocolate pies. 

I guess it will be plenty evident soon enough.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

My Mom

I love how much she loves these rotten little creatures.
I don't know anyone else who would come to visit and wear herself out trying to make things easier for me and try to call it a vacation. I don't know anyone else who would hand roll 100 meatballs, make giant pots of homemade sauce to fill my freezer, or make my husband prime rib when she shouldn't be doing much of anything at all.

I don't know anyone else who will fight me to help out when I truly should be the one helping her.

My mom has Multiple Sclerosis and a back that is all but broken among a host of other consistent physical challenges that I don't even know if I could recall. She made a comment to me that her hip might be broken and then she proceeded to come to Georgia to see her daughter and son-in-law.  I mean...

We don't have a picture-perfect relationship by any stretch, but I am truly grateful for all of the love she has in her heart.

She aches when I ache. She aches even when she thinks I'm aching. She cries for me all of the time. I don't know anyone else who cares for me and loves me like she does. I don't know anyone who, if given the chance, would take away all of mine and Jimmy's stuff by taking it on herself.

I worry about my mom all of the time and I know she worries about me and sometimes we let each other know that in between all of the bickering. Guess that means we're mother and daughter.

By being my Mother's daughter, I've learned to love, care and nurture as well as clean and cook. All things that should be wonderfully handy come October.

And if I had paid closer attention I would probably know how to sew and whistle like a boss. 

Happy Mother's Day, Mom.

Sunday, April 27, 2014

The Announcement


It's out there. That part is finally over, although I did drop the biggest hint ever a couple of weeks ago. Worrying about when we were "gonna put it out there" was an actually thing happening in my head. Some people wait until 20 weeks. Some announce at 6 or 8 weeks and don't think another thing about it. I guess there's no right answer.

I probably could have waited a little longer (who knows if I would have ever been ready) but oh the frick well. Jimmy was ready awhile ago. I picked up his hand and actually used his pointer finger to hit the POST button to send it out. I was having silly anxiety and was a little sweaty even. It's the same anxiety I had when I first posted about making the decision to start IVF. 

But now I can talk about it and write about it! That part I'm happy about. No more hiding in my little pregnancy bubble.

I've had four good-lookin' ultrasounds. Over the past 13.5 weeks, we've seen a little blob turn into an actual thing that actually looks like a baby. Wha? How? Science? Okay.

Still can't believe it.  CANNOT BELIEVE IT.

My first trimester is wrapping up as we speak. It was... not bad. I didn't puke, although there was nausea and weird aversions. My fridge: the sight, smell could make me not want to eat. I took a crap load of naps and even fell asleep before ten sometimes which is unheard of.  Tried to eat healthy but hormones (yeah, that's what I'll blame it on) may have gotten the best of me. I'm sure to get a lecture from my OB on my first official visit in a few weeks. 

I guess the good news is that I seem to have more energy now. I don't want junk all the time. I mean realistically, I have my moments, but stopping for a dozen Krispy Kremes and eating and unspecified amount of that dozen no longer sounds appealing. 

Jimmy is keeping in character about this whole baby thing. I think he's pretty excited, but I don't know how real it feels for him yet. I feel like when the bump starts to grow, maybe it will be more believable. But then again, maybe I'm not giving Jimmy enough credit.  Maybe he's just "man excited."  

Here's the growth of Baby Moore as we've seen it. I realize I'm lucky to have had this many ultrasounds, but I had two at the fertility clinic before I was released to a regular OB. 

Without further ado, our little Beanie... 

Friday, April 18, 2014

Giveaway Winner

Hi! Happy Friday. I have the winner of the Carry On, Warrior book giveaway.

Random.org gave me number THREE. And, the 3rd person to enter was Dana Ritter! Congratulations Dana! Yay, free stuff! I think you'll just love it.

Send me an email with your home address and I'll get it out to you. My email button is on the blog bar under "Connect."

Happy reading, friend!  Whew. That was fun.

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Carry On, Warrior Giveaway

As a thank you for taking part in the Messy, Beautiful Warrior Project, Glennon and the folks at Momastery sent me a book to keep or giveaway. 

Lucky ducky for you, I have a signed copy that I probably will re-read this summer. I plan to be on a beach at some point. I need the beach very soon.

This book was just released in paperback on it's one year anniversary. This is the version I have to giveaway. 

Here's some of the what you can expect from G-Dog's baby-child, Carry On, Warrior:

*I've never particularly felt good at friendships. Friendship's demands -- like remembering important dates, answering the phone, and navigating group dynamics -- don't come easy to me. I have a reclusive side and a Sister. These two things make friendship hard for me to notice how much I need friends.

*Recently there was some talk in my Bible study class about homosexuality being sinful. I quoted Mother Teresa and said, "When we judge people we have no time to love them." I was immediately reprimanded for my blasphemy by a woman who reminded me of 1 Corinthians 6:9-10. But I was confused because this woman was speaking. In church. And she was also wearing a necklace. And I could see her hair, baby. She had no head covering. All of which are soooooo totally against the New Testament Bible Rules. And so I assumed that she had decided not to follow the parts of the Bible that limited her particular freedoms, but to hold fast to the parts that limit the freedoms of others. 

*Baby, if you see a child being left out, or hurt, or teased, part of your heart will hurt a little. Your Daddy and I want you to trust that heartache... That heartache is called compassion, and it's God's signal to you to do something.  

There are many good life nuggets in this book. You don't have to agree with everything she says, or be religious to get something out of it.  It's a book worthy of a spot on the shelf, if you ask me.

Rules for the giveaway:

1) You must be an official follower of this blog to be qualify. 
2) You have to live in the US. 
3) Leave a comment and tell me that you want it!

A winner will be chosen at random (there's technology for that) by Noon EST on Friday, April 18th. I will post the winner of the giveaway on the blog then, so check back.

Good luck!