Friday, March 12, 2010

I wanted to write..

I wanted to write a blog about how bitter I am at the world right now.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about how some people suck ass so freaking bad. And how the anger gets more and more pent up with each passing day.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about how I want to scream, and punch and spit and kick.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about the rain, and how cozy it makes one's living room and how it just doesn't help the mood swings.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about work. And my frustrations and fears.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about my future. Marriage. Kids. Life and death.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about how, 28 years in, and everyday, I'm still unhappy with my body.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about how unfair it is that I'm going to have to miss out on some major family events this year, because of my job and this business.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog defending myself. Defending my actions. Saying: I'm not wrong! I'm not the bad guy.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog telling my dearest friends how a lot of times I think about how I should've called, or should've asked more about things they are going through.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a blog about how sad I am. How much faith I've lost in people. And how I know it will all change when the sun comes out again.

But I won't.

I wanted to write a deep, dark, depressing blog.

But I won't.

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